Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
