Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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