i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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