no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Randomize
