Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
i dont even know how to be here
you will always have a special place in my vag
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
