I can't watch pbs sober anymore
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
