It's Friday. Sex?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
