I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
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