Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Is Oprah even human
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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