"it" just moved
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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