"it" just moved
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
