i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
