It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
this is an emotional support booty call
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
