apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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