You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
