you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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