this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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