I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Randomize
