If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize