"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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