i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Please, let me fuck your mom
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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