Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize