just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
