I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize