I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
