If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
