no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
