Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
