Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize