I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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