God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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