Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Randomize
