i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Randomize
