He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
