try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
