I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Can you bring me the toilet please
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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