If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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