why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Randomize
