i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
the night ended with taco bell and tears
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
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