oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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