Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
