I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
