tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
