you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize
