I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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