so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
