just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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