once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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