No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
