Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Randomize
