How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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